Happy Birthday!!

Every beautiful 30 year old deserves some dancers on their birthday. Ryan Reynolds was booked, so I got the next best thing!

Click here ------------->.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rW6M8D41ZWU&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Twenty-Five Things About Me

Note: I am re-posting this. I original wrote this on 11 February in the year of our Lord, Two Thousand and Nine. I thought it deserved a better place to live than a Facebook Note.


1. I was born as a triceratops to two loving reptile parents in 1983. Not too many people know that New Mexico was once wetlands and many dinosaurs lived in our region. I don't think dinosaurs died from a meteor. I think they just got tired of earth and decided to move to a different planet. In fact, I don't think, I know cause I was invited. I like earth.

2. I love NM. People always assume that my state is mostly desert.. it is mostly desert. But there are some parts of NM that aren't desert. We have mountains. We have (small) mountain lakes and there are trees. Some forests in New Mexico relieve lots of moisture. Some parts of New Mexico are even green. Who cares? No one should. I'm not even angry. New Mexico sucks for most people, but that's fine. I'm happy I was born in such a different state. 

3. There was a blind man named Tony in my neighborhood when I was a kid. He had a bench next to a bush that he would sit on and listen to the birds and to me and my brothers playing. The bush had purple flowers that smelled very good and when I smell these flowers it reminds me of Tony. I would sit and talk to Tony in the cool Santa Fe evenings. He talked to me about life in Santa Fe in the 20s. I watched Tony write in braille in his workshop. Sometimes, Tio Cipriano (or just 'Tio' for me) would sit and talk to Tony too and I would join in on their conversation. 

4. I miss my grandpa. He is the reason why I'm curious about the world around me. He is the reason why I love music. I would go to my grandpa's house nearly everyday and read his encyclopedias and study his maps. My grandpa would tell me about the great classical musicians and also about mariachi music. My grandpa would play is harp and sing for me often. I watched my grandpa do his voice exercises. Sometimes we would go to the plaza and I would chase the pigeons. 

5. I like everything my dad likes. 

6. I admire my mom's compassion.

7. I want to go to England

8. The economy is aiiight

9. I enjoyed the movie Free Willie... 

10. I drew a 18th century ship for an art contest in the 6th grade and I won 2nd place.

11. I would like to widdle a boat from a single piece of wood.

12. I want to make a to-scale model of Albuquerque's downtown in a garage one day... so the tallest building would be about six feet high.

13. My brothers rock. I love them. I'm proud of both of them.

14. I've never visited Canada

15. I think I would enjoy a rainy climate.

16. Angels in the Outfield was an amazing movie. So was Rookie of the Year. My all time favorite move is Bedknobs and Broomsticks.

17. I think I would enjoy living in a castle. 

18. All things grow??

19. I don't believe in showers

20. I met Gov. King in the 2nd grade. We sang Las Mananitas to Mrs. King on her birthday. 

21. Michael Catnak's mom had a garden of mint and Michael and I would catch rolly pollies and snails.. we never hurt them though. 

22. MxPx rules. They changed my life. I met all three in Colo. Sprgs. this past April. It was amazing.
http://bobthehermit.blogspot.com/2013/11/twenty-five-things-about-me.html
23. I miss my friends that moved away from me

24. I want an akita. 

25. Sufjan is sweet

Dude It Feels Much Hotter

Dude, it feels much hotter than 60°F. I was just sitting outside and eating the amazing lunch Lindsey packed for me. I felt like I was being baked alive. It's November 1. What the heck? I think that it'll probably cool off quite a bit in the next couple of weeks. It's what happens when we go further into autumn.

Drove To Chicago

Hey y'all. I don't usually use "y'all", but hey it's Halloween and Lavar Burton says "y'all" in a lot of his Twitter posts. You may ask yourself what Halloween has to do with anything, it doesn't. I'm just a random dude.

So it's Halloween today. That's exciting. This is the mark of the holiday season. Before you know it it'll be thanksgiving, then Christmas, then before you know it you'll be kissing your sweetheart at the stroke of midnight. So I'm excited that this year is wrapping up, mostly because I've used up all of my vacation for the year. It'll be nice to take a vacation. Maybe have some free time with Lindsey.

This morning was nice. Lindsey and I read a really heavy chapter of Hebrews. It was Hebrews 10. I'll have to read it a couple more times today. I'm still digesting it. I'll have some time today too because we're training some new ideas at work today. Right now is lunch. Time to breathe. Time to listen to this new (to me) Sufjan Stevens record.

Gums

Dude, my gums hurt. Dental health. I've gotta floss more. That's what I'm thinking about right now. I've been thinking about how flipping dumb politics are in our country. It's like rooting for a football team. I wish I could just not care about politics, but I know how important it is to be involved. I listen to a conservative talk show host as well as a liberal talk show host. They're both just so angry. They don't pay attention to real issues and just follow along with what they're supposed to think as a republican or as a democrat.
I really don't identify with either. I'm a Christian and that shouldn't play a role in what party I choose, but in America if you're a Christian then you're a republican. That's how it seems anyway. I don't want to be a republican. I hate the way Republican's view social programs. So I'm just a dude who really has no political voice in this country.

I'm still developing views on the really heavy issues. I think I will always have an evolving view. And I don't want my political views to ever cloud my priorities.

I'm Done With My Smartphone Fast

I'm not going to lie, I do enjoy me some technology. I guess it all started when I was in high school and my dad bought me my own computer.

It was used and kinda crappy, but I thought it was the coolest thing ever. I'm guessing it probably boasted 64mb of ram or less, maybe a 133 MHz processor and Windows 95. I used Netzero and when anyone called our house the line was sure to be busy. I think at the time Netzero only allowed like 20 hours of internet a month...something like that. So there were other free internet providers out there that I would use. After persistent begging, I even got my mom to sign us up for AOL. No banners and unlimited internet. It was the coolest.

So that was a brief history of my enjoyment of technology. It continues today. My current computer is much better than what I was using in 1998, but still obsolete in today's standard. It's a refurb HP I got from New Egg for $100... yeah, my computer was $100. Not bad for the specs I'm running. 3.2 GHz dual core Intel Pentium 4, 2 GB RAM, a 40 GB hard drive (2 TB external) and running Ubuntu 12.04. My video is too crappy to run Google Earth, but it definitely gets the job done in web browsing and...web browsing. And, for $100. So I'm happy.

I've been kinda obsessing about other computers though. Well, it's more of lusting. One computer I can't get off my mind is the iMac. Millions of other people who have much more wealth or much more debt than I already own this beast. Macs aren't beasts on the spec sheet but they definitely get the job done in real world situations. I would like to say that video editors and musicians are mostly just trendy folk, but I think that there are real benefits to OSX and the reliability of a company who assembles the hardware that there software is installed on. So, I'll probably continue dreaming about a Mac, and I'll probably never pull the trigger because the "bang" does not justify the "buck". Also, if I snort the Mac cocaine, then I'm afraid I'll be one of those Prius driving skiers with apple stickers slapped all over my car. I think the world can use less "smug".

The other computer I've been dreaming of and probably will never get is the Chromebook Pixel. This thing is pretty! Dat display!!! Macs cleverly named and catchy Retina Display's got nothing on this. Full aluminum body and Chrome OS. Chrome OS has definitely got its limits, but if you use all of the Google services then it will do just fine. The price tag is steep still. Less than a Mac Book Pro...but not by much.

Something a bit more reasonable is the HP Chromebook 11. It's $279 and it's got a good design. Specs are okay...not a gaming machine, but it's good for what I (and pretty much everyone else in America) do...web browse. So Google for the win in my opinion. Windows crashes and is buggy and gets viruses, Mac is forbidden from the peons and Google just gets it. I'll never be able to sync my iPod with 160 GB of music, but I'll never need to when I have Google music.

P.S. I'm done with my smartphone fast.

Jeremy is My Buddy

I had a thought for a story when I was driving home form work yesterday. My car is so messy. There is trash, old Tupperware bowls and even a banana peel laying around. It's downright gross. Then I thought it would be funny if life could evolve on its own with only the materials in my disgusting car. Then I thought how funny it would be if evolution could be accelerated and before I knew it, there was a little ape man living in my car. I would keep this a secret from Lindsey and everyone else of course. The little ape man would have an honorary little 'tude. He'd probably like me, but he would play pranks on me like cover my eyes when I'm driving to work, or give me wet willies when I'm not expecting it. I think I would probably call him Jeremy. Jeremy and I would have adventures on my commute.

I've been physically, and mentally drained and spiritually I've been running on empty. Dag nab it! Life can become overwhelming. At this very moment, Luke is waking up from his nap. Sometimes I just want to have all my ducks in a row and I want to have a few minutes to think that I don't have to worry about anything. That water bill or that smartphone that takes up too much of my time.

Whew... it seems that Luke is gonna nap for a few more minutes.

Our house is slowly being overtaken by weeds. It's insane that weeds grow so well in the desert but it takes 4 trillion gallons of water to keep a lawn semi-green. Today, I was thinking about how I hate Albuquerque and New Mexico. Hate is a strong word. I guess I just need something new. I hate that people from this state fall into the same ol', same ol'. Same baby daddy, same drug, same shot of whiskey. Have you driven west on Central? Have you driven east on Central? It's probably one of the ugliest streets in America. I'm trying to be nice. And it does make me sad, because this is home. I'm from New Mexico and I do love it. The culture makes us unique, but it also makes me hate living here. I'm tired of being afraid that I'll be t-boned by some muchasmo, dumb ass who has some weird idea that he has to be a man by driving 3,000 km/h. Slow the EFFFFFF down you asshole! Learn how to handle a four-way-stop. Four-way-stop doesn't mean four-way-coast. Learn what that word yield means written on that upside down triangle. It doesn't mean drag race your stupid Dodge/Ford/Chevy/GMC pick-up.

I guess this is a venting blog. I need it. I'm sick and tired of Albuquerque. I'm sick and tired of New Mexico. And I'm sick and tired of America. Get over yourself, America. Republicans suck. Democrats suck. If you really are a "Christian Nation" then look to your Savior. He said to love your neighbor. Churches have become corporations with tax breaks. Shame on you Calvary. Shame on you Mars Hill. Mega churches bring some good, but it's an elite club where people go to drink coffee and feel all cozy about themselves. There are real people out there hurting and you're selling your next book. I'm the biggest hypocrite. What am I doing for hurting people? Well, maybe I'm a hurting person.

I think I need to get out. I need to get away from it all. I need to meditate in the forest.

Something I just Read

Galatians 2:15-21 NASB

"We are Jews by nature and not sinners from among the Gentiles; nevertheless knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the Law but through faith in Christ Jesus, even we have believed in Christ Jesus, so that we may be justified by faith in Christ and not by the works of the Law; since by the works of the Law no flesh will be justified. But if, while seeking to be justified in Christ, we ourselves have also been found sinners, is Christ then a minister of sin? May it never be! For if I rebuild what I have once destroyed, I prove myself to be a transgressor. For through the Law I died to the Law, so that I might live to God. I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. I do not nullify the grace of God, for if righteousness comes through the Law, then Christ died needlessly."

I had to read this a few times. It defines Christ to me. Humans will try and try to be good on our own. But every time we fail. This is proven by the world we live in. I really want to read this a thousand more times to let it sink in. I'd write more on this if I didn't have to get back to work. What do you think about this?

By Your Grace...

I have a "heavy" heart today and I have no idea why.

I'm excited though because I have some extra time from work. I can sit in this giant hallway and think. I feel like I'm working all the time and I'm only going to work more next week.

Work has made life become boring. I'm here all the dang time. I want more time with Luke and more time with Lindsey. That's life though. And I'm enjoying the time I have with my family, I just want more time.

So I'm listening to The Modern Post right now. It's kinda crazy how Dustin Kensrue moved from being the singer in Thrice to a worship leader in a church. I didn't see that coming.

Religion is a crazy thing. I think about it all the time. Maybe that's why my heart is "heavy". It's not because the Yankees are struggling to get into the playoffs. My life so far has been a not-so-spiritual experience. This sounds weird coming from a person who claims to be a Christian. Sure, I feel God's presence sometimes...but not like others claim, I guess. I become emotional when I listen and sing the words to old hymns. I still wouldn't consider myself that "spiritual". Does that make me a bad Christian? Maybe.

I also feel like sometimes I'm alone. I try to get along with people and I try to make friends. I think I'm awkward in social situations. That's probably why I'm a social media whore. I'm sure people don't want to know what's going on in Zo's head. I'll write it down anyway. People especially don't want to know about my spiritual journey. Is it weird to people I've known in the past to know that I love God? I'll bet. Zo's a dumbass! "God's fake." I can't say that! Sometimes I wish I could. God goes against a lot of rational thinking. But I still have faith. I still believe that God created the Universe. And that God loves me. How stupid is Zo for believing this?! A huge idiot, right?

Well, if you're still reading this, then I'm sorry. Zo isn't who you thought he was. Zo talks in third person apparently. Anyway. Moving on. Life is here.

Just Sayin

Is the idea of God so far fetched? I'm pondering these things like I always do. I'm talking about God. Yahweh. Jehovah. The one who was, who is and who will always be. The Alpha and the Omega. I ask myself if I'm believing a lie all the time. And every time the answer is "no". I'm not. It's not like I want to disprove God, it's more like if there is a way to disprove God, then I'll find out how that can be done. I also find that when I am looking for ways to prove He isn't there that I'm drawn closer to who He is. I also don't want to believe blindly. I think that's the worst way to believe.

So I'll continue to seek... Sometimes I ask the difficult questions. What if God was made up? God was used to force the believing population to be governed. This doesn't make sense to me because the ancient Israelites didn't listen, they didn't cooperate.

There are a lot of cases that will rise up as "proof" that God doesn't exist. Pain is one. If God exists, then why are there Syrians dying the way they did? Children suffering. I've seen the images and they broke my heart. Why didn't God save the innocent? These questions are hard to answer and I don't know.

But can anyone prove God? I think that we can make a great case. Most of my "proof" is in nature though. I see these mountains and I see God. Sure, they were formed over billions of years of the Earth's natural formation process. We have evidence as to how the mountains were formed. But what moved those forces? What caused the Earth's plates to move? Natural laws are just that...laws. How can a law exist if there was no law maker in the first place? These are the questions I ask.

There is something that is more real to me than the Manzano mountains though. The biggest thing that points to God to me is Love. What's love? It's not like gravity or light that it can be explained by some some equation. Love is real. Why does Love exist? Preservation? Does it make evolutionarily sense to love? Love is deeper though. I love Lindsey, I love Luke. There's more. I don't know everything and I really don't know anything. I do know that I want to know more. I want to know God more. I also don't think having faith means that I'm weak. I felt that way sometimes.

It's sometimes difficult being a Christian in the United States. I feel like Americans root for Christianity like they would root for their football team. They don't question why they claim to be Christians. They brag to the rest of the world that their team is winning. Being american means being Christian. And somehow that means you vote republican, love american trucks and love guns. When did being an advocate of guns and Republicans become a prerequisite to being a Christian? So, I have a ton more questions. I'll write them down...

Dry Desert; 4

So the journey begins. At this point it's like nothing existed before. Nothing except my love for Jack and Holly. My life is just beginning. With Holly's necklace clutched in my fist, I have to push forward.

The acid rain pounding on my back as I'm kneeling down, I find motivation. I should be thinking about my lungs that are in pain, or the stabbing feeling I have in my stomach from not eating in days. I'm not. Jack and Holly are my oxygen. They're all I care about now.

Movement is all I can think about at this point. The sooner I can start moving the sooner I can see them. The military took them somewhere safe I hope. I'm thinking they're in some bunker somewhere. There's really no way in telling though. They could be anywhere. I'm guessing they didn't tell men because there wasn't enough room for everyone. I don't know that for certain either.

There are some wondering men around Albuquerque. Many of them have gone insane in their loneliness. I think some of them may be in my situation though. I'm beginning to come to my wits though. I could have been one of those insane guys walking up and down the street, screaming at the top of my lungs. The rain helps though. Memories are awakened of me playing in Tiguex Park with my boy and Holly. Afternoon picnics were always fun after Sunday church services. One July I remember it raining almost every say one week. That's a rare occurrence in Albuquerque, even during monsoon season.

So, the next move is on my end. What's my plan of attack? And how do I get there while keeping my sanity. I think first I should find a way to get some food and water in my belly. My physical being can't make it much further.

Love

Laying in the bed by myself sucks. Married for almost five years and this is only the second time I've gone to sleep without my Love. It's difficult...I'm not gonna lie. I did my fair share of laying by myself before I was married. I'll admit though that at this point in time it may be healthy. Lindsey is at a women's retreat with her good friend, Jenna. Marriage is something that I don't pretend to understand. I think that a lot of people don't understand marriage, thus the astronomical divorce rate. Marriage is about love. I think sacrifice comes in a close second however. Yes, I love my wife...with all my heart. Sacrifice is what we're still getting used to. At least I am. My life has completely changed in the past five years.

Who was I five years ago? Well, I was still Lorenzo. College going, beer drinking, karaoke singing. Seeking... I was seeking God. I was seeking love. We're all seeking love. I think humans need love to survive more than we need oxygen and water. Not just anyone can provide that love. I need to be loved and I need to love. I love Luke. He's my boy. And I didn't pick who he is. He came like he is. And I love him. My love for Luke and the love that Lindsey and I have, I think, are a metaphor for the love of God.

"Luke, don't put that in your mouth, that'll hurt you." There are plenty of things that Luke wants to do that I won't let him do because I know what's best for him. Yet Luke gets angry. He'll throw a fit. I don't care, I'm his dad and I know best.

So here I am. Laying by myself. Luke's in a crib next to me. Life is about this. Life is about love. Life's about trying to keep the love in our lives. Just like our lungs strain for oxygen, our hearts long for that love. Love of God. Love of our spouse. Love of our children.

Just In Thought

It's funny. I had a lit of things on my mind just now and the second I open my blog app I forget everything. I think this happens to me often.

So life. What a crazy thing. So much is happening. I was thinking about the universe the other day. Maybe it's because of all the Star Trek: the Next Generation I've been watching with Lindsey. I was thinking about how huge Earth is in comparison to me. I could stand to lose some weight, but still I'm so incredibly small. The Earth, huge to me, is so small in comparison to our expanding universe. How are we safe? There are dangers being hurled all over the place. The Sun is dangerous. Meteors. Can we predict our safety? Is the universe predictable or unpredictable? My mind is stretched. I'm a man of faith, so I have faith that God has everything in control. But sometimes I wonder.

And I'm so small and my son is even smaller than I, but Luke is so huge to me. He's such a little guy but he's the Universe to Lindsey and I.

I'm just pondering things. Thinking about all of these things take me away. I stress out about things. Thinks like bills. Things like my job. Jesus said not to worry about these petty things. He said that he cares about he flowers and the birds and that they don't worry, yet look how beautiful and carefree they are (I'm paraphrasing). Man. Thinking about how God put this ever expanding universe in motion and he cares for me pretty much blows my mind.
This morning I met with some guys from our church. We read some Proverbs. It was real nice to hang out with them. We also spoke about David and Solomon. Heroes of the Bible yet full of flaws. Dang! We talked about how David lusted after Bathsheba then killed her husband just so he could get a piece of her. And he's a Bible hero. Solomon too. Conqubines and wives. God's love. God is love. I'm just in thought today...

Lost and Found

I can't believe it. I thought I lost me wedding ring! Key word "thought". The other day I went for a run and when I came back I took a shower. After I showered I noticed I didn't have my wedding ring on. WTF?! I thought maybe I could have lost it while pulling weeds. After my run I decided to pull some weeds. But after searching my front yard thoroughly I still couldn't find it. I had no idea where I lost it. For three days I had no wedding ring...well...sort of. I put a keyring on my finger that served a the symbol of my commitment and love to Lindsey.

Today Lindsey and I were cleaning and she found my ring! It was on a jewelry rack she has. I vaguely remember placing it there. The important thing is that I found it. It was lost and that really sucked! But I found it and that is awesome!

Same 'Ol

It's really cloudy outside. I love it! There has been thunder booming all afternoon. I hope this weather keeps up.

Other than the weather, there have been things on my mind. I lost my wedding ring. That sucked. I lost it when I went for a run. It's good that I'm running, but it sucks that I lost my dang ring! I'm hoping to find it soon. I think it may have fallen off while I was pulling weeds.

My thoughts are scattered right now.

My ring. Running. iPhone 5. Rain. Mae.

So I said iPhone 5. I'm considering an iPhone again. Whatevs.

Mae. I'm listening to a Mae recording I've not heard before. It's called (e)vening. So far it's okay. My favorite will always be The Everglow.

Well, I think I'll leave this scattered post where it is. I'll post some photos and stuff and hopefully next time I'll be more organized with my thoughts.

MxPx Rules!!!!!

I'm sitting on our back patio listening to the best band in the universe +MxPx. I love them so much. I really don't think anyone reads this blog, so then no one will mind me saying how much I truly love +MxPx. I don't know why I'm placing a Google + tag in front of +MxPx. I doubt they have a Google +. I have a Google + and I'm active on it. No one else I know is active on G+.

That's okay though. Facebook is a bunch of rubbish. I'm sick and tired of reading about friend's and family's lives. J/k. I do care about my friends and family. I think it's just a protest I'm taking due to the lack of human to human interaction. I am the biggest hippocryte I know though. I gave up Facebook to be active on Inatagram (a Facebook company), G+, Vine, Foursquare, Twitter, and I'll even check my MySpace from time to time.

Whatever though. Today is good so far. My boy is amazing. My wife is amazing. Beer is good and I'm going to watch some local #ABQ baseball later this evening.

Ack! My back!

My back hurts! Well,it doesn't hurt as much as it did when I woke up. That sucker was in pain! I could barely even pick up Luke this morning. Luckily, lines had some supper strong pain killers left over from when she has a root canal.

Days off are nice still. My back is feeling much better, my coffee mug still has coffee in it, and there's a pizza in the oven. There's a lot I want to get done today. I think I'll ask my father in law if I can borrow his lawn mower--our lawn is about to take over Albuquerque. By the way, how awesome has all this rain been? If you're not from ABQ then you don't understand. It doesn't rain much here and when it does rain, we rejoice. At least I do. The other day Lindsey, Luke and I did our own little storm chase and we found ourselves in a flooded street on Candelaria and Richmond. There was nearly a foot of rushing water! This monsoon season has been good so far. I pray it doesn't let up, we need the rain badly.

Well, I think I'm done writing for now. It's time to look through our garage and find scrap lumber. I'm going to attempt to build some shelves.

Who's God? A friend?

It's crazy how friendship affects you. I have lacked communication with people outside of Lindsey and Luke. Lindsey and Luke are the most important humans to me in the world... This last month I was able to have one on one time with a friend.

Life... This is a consistant theme to my blog posts. Friendships come and friendships go. Our character is shaped by the friendships we encounter in our lives. I hope all the time that I'm able to have a positive influence on people I come in contact with.

On another topic...I've really been enjoying this record from Jeff Scheeweis. It's a worship album, but it's not lame. God is real when I listen to these songs. For me I wonder where God is sometimes. I do look at God in a logical way. I believe that science and God can't be separated.

This is a good record for me to meditate on those thoughts...who God is.

American Church

I was 18 living on my own for the first time. Blindside released Silence, the most epic album in my view. I couldn't blast that album loud enough. I haven't really followed my favorite bands like I have in the past, I just found out Blindside has a new album...that was released in 2011. Lame! I'm a bad fan. I'm listening to it now though and I like it a lot so far.

That's one thing I wanted to say... Another thing I was thinking about was church, specifically church in America. I'm kinda turned off by it. Lindsey and I had chance to drive across the country. While we were driving through Arkansas we had the pleasure of stumbling upon an interesting radio show called Frances and Friends. In the show they condemned people who drink alcohol, Christians who support the idea that Jesus' first miricle was turning water into alcoholic wine and not grape juice, homosexuals and a German woman.

It was a painful conversation to listen to but it was interesting to hear what a large population believes. These people at Frances and Friends would take every opportunity to support their theology with a book that was written by one of their pastors. They would also plug these books and encourage the sale of them. Not only would they plug the books they authored but they would also plug a bible they publish with commentary they added.

These people are extreme in their beliefs and extremely off point. I saw through their facade and saw a business selling religion. They are fake. What's sad to me is that I can see their fakeness but a large audience doesn't see it and they drop tons of money on their books.

Frances and Friends is extreme but I feel that the church as a whole in America is a huge business. Mars Hill Church in Seattle and Calvary Chapel are a few less extreme churches that come to mind for me. Pastors from these churches always have a book their plugging. They have visually appealing churches and church logos. They are active in social media. Are they sincere about Jesus? Or are they sincere about their careers? I feel like churches in America strive to be successful for all the wrong reasons. It's all very confusing to me. I want to research my thoughts more. I want to talk about it more.

Life

I love my God. I love my wife. I love my son. It's so great to watch the sunset. If I'm rested,  or even if I'm not, it's great to watch the sunrise. Cool rain falling from the sky refreshes me. I remember driving in the forest with you. The pine trees make me feel so small. The view of the aspens in that valley were breathtakingly gorgeous.  Remember when we watched that band play? I'm not going to be here forever and either are you. I want to live my life. I want to have a full life. I even want to enjoy my days at work. Let's listen to music. Let's make memories. Let's meet new people,  hear their stories. Enjoy a pint or two. The warm sun on our skin.  The cool breeze on our face.  The sand underneath our feet. Throw away our smartphones.  Talk about life.  Watch our son grow up. Sure,  make some mistakes.  +lindsey dominguez

Evening Walk

Watch "Evening Walk" on YouTube

Rest and Rejuvenation

We're going camping this weekend. Well sort of... we'll be in a cabin. I'm just excited to get out of town for a while. I've been feeling really stuck lately. Scheduling at work has been weird. I want more time with Lindsey and Luke. I need a vacation more than anything. We're going to have a vacation but I'm a little worried about it. We'll be driving to Atlanta soon and possibly Orlando and Disney World. I'm worried because I've never driven that far...much less with Luke. Luke has a difficult time being in the car when we drive to Santa Fe from Albuquerque.  So, I'm afraid we're going to have a miserable time. I want this to be an adventure.  I want to make memories with the two most important people in the world to me. I'm still optimistic. I think the trip will be okay, but it's one thing I'm worried about.

I've been worrying a lot lately.  I'm worried about house work. Being a home owner is awesome and I feel blessed. It's hard work though.  I just fixed our dishwasher that decided to crap out suddenly.  It was a simple fix, it still added steess to me. I'm worried about our lawn.  Sounds dumb but it's hard to grow grass in Albuquerque.  Water is expensive and we're in the middle of the worst drought in history. I feel bad warering my lawn and all the warer I put on the lawn is just evaporated the next day. The story of my life these days. I need rain in my life. Real rain for my lawn. But I need rain in my life. I need rejuvenation.  I need rest. I need to grow. I'm in a desert.  I need time to raise my son. I need time to take my beautiful wife out. Just take me to the mountains and let me breath in that cool air.

A Challenging Week

It's the beginning of the week. This week will bring challenges. Luke will wake up in the middle of the night sometime this week. I won't have much time with Lindsey this week. I'll have to work this week. School work will have to be done this week. So, this week will be challenging. That's not so bad, though.

I'm happy to be challenged. It feels good to know that you've accomplished something during the week. This week I plan on going to work. I'll do my best. I plan on spending time with Luke. That'll be fun.

So, even though I'm not thrilled the weekend is over and my week is beginning, I'm still happy to be challenged.  Besides, my weekend isn't over. It's Sunday night and I still have a movie to watch with Lindsey.

There's other stuff on my mind... I can't think of it now.

Oh yeah! I wanted to talk about a great blog I read today. Here's the link. There was some really insightful words written in this blog.

Other things...
The inlaws came over for dinner tonight.  It was great talking to them about their trip to Hawaii.  I'd love to go sometime. I just love to spend time with other people and converse about life.

I think this is all I want to write right now. I think I'll watch some videos about the HTC One right now. That's all.

 

I think Our Tree is Dead

This blog is becoming more of a journal for me. Well, not completely. There are certain things I wouldn't say on this blog that I would say in a journal.

I am a bit sad about our tree in the front yard. I just noticed today that all of our trees have leaves on its branches except this one. It's really sad that this one does not have leaves because it's a fairly tall and established tree. I really hope that it's just sick and I can bring it back somehow. I did look up how to find out if a tree is dead. I guess you can do a scrape test on the bark of the tree. If there is green under the bark then the tree is alive. If it's just brown dry bark, then it's probably dead.

I did a scrape test on one side of the tree and it's brown, but on the other side there's remnants of green. Not to mention that a couple of the small branches don't snap off as easy as others. I think there's a little life left in this puppy. It would really suck if I had to chop it down. Here's the website I read about the scrape test on. http://tinaramsey.blogspot.com/2011/04/how-can-you-tell-if-tree-or-shrub-is.html

The other challenge I have is identifying this other large tree we have. It's little baby seedlings are popping up all over the place. I have a feeling it's a pest tree. But I want to find out. I was using this website to determine what type of tree it is. The result was Kentucky coffee tree, but I don't think that's right.

Well, lunch is almost ready for me and Luke is waking up from his short nap. I think I was going to right about more things, like how I wish it would rain and stuff. But maybe that'll be a topic for next time.

A Post About Loneliness and How it Disappeared and Mike Herrera Podcast

It's Thursday! Oh man, this week... I thought it was going by slowly, but now it's Thursday. I woke up this morning and I didn't feel very good. I kinda miss the good ol' days when I could sleep in and feel rested when I wake up.
...
...
...
...
...
...
I take that back. I felt rested when I woke up, but I also woke up alone. I get to wake up to my son crying now. That sounds bad, but it's really not, because when I walk into his room, that little boy sees me and his crying turns into a panicked  laugh and he's eager for me to pick him up. I then pick up that little boy and tell him "good morning" and give him a big kiss. He is mine and Lindsey's joy. So we don't get sleep anymore. That's a easy trade-off. For me it was sleep or a family. I chose family every time. Lindsey is my world, my love, she is what I was waiting for when I was waking up alone in my studio apartment on High Street. She is what satisfied my empty feeling. Now we have each other and I'm not alone anymore.

Sleep. Who needs it?

Luke and I just went for a walk. I pulled off a leaf from an oak tree (I think it's an oak tree). I'm going to save this leaf. I'm sentimental like that. I save leafs from periods of time that are important to me. I know that these walks with Luke will always be important to me. I'll place this leaf in a book and I'll probably forget about it, but hopefully one day I'll open that book and I'll see this leaf and remember taking walks with Luke in the park.

Anyway, other stuff is going on, but I really don't know if I have the energy to talk about them. Plus, Luke needs a diaper change and he needs to nap. So I'll probably do that now. After he naps I may listen to the Mike Herrera Podcast. What a change this guy has gone though. I mean I guess. I don't know him so I don't know if he's changed at all. I have loved MxPx music for a really long time. I studied his lyrics in songs, so I thought I had a good idea of who Mike Herrera was, but he's completely different from what I thought. Here's the link to his Tumblr page where you can listen to his podcasts. -------> Mike Herrera Podcast . I love talk radio and his show if very interesting.

Last note. I promise I'm done. I'm listening to Valencia's new (to me) album Dancing With a Ghost. AMAZING! I'm buying this puppy. I suggest you at least give it a listen on Spotify, YouTube, or whatever.

Bye.

drought

My gosh, it's been a busy week. And it's only Tuesday! I feel like the work week is dragging and the weekends just fly by. I need to figure out a way to enjoy my week more instead of just working though it. I think that's probably something that many American's struggle with.

I think this upcoming weekend should be nice, though. We're picking up Lindsey's parents from the airport. They enjoyed a long, nearly two-week vacation in Hawai'i. I'm jealous! I would love to vacation on the beach, enjoying the beautiful weather. By "beautiful weather" I mean warm and raining, or even cool and raining. I love the rain. I love New Mexico too, which is funny because it feels like it hasn't rained here in years. We really are in record drought. Anyway, this weekend...

After picking up the in-laws I want to get some yard work done. We have grass (sort of) and I want to maintain the grass. I would like to buy some seed and get our lawn in awesome shape. Here's a picture of our grass now.

I hope to get this grass in top-top shape. But again, we're in a drought and it sucks. I feel bad for watering so much. This is funny to me, too, in Missouri we had grass and we didn't even have to ask for it, or work for it. It just grew. This occurrence is something I'm only familiar to in the New Mexican mountains. In the city, grass just doesn't grow, in the Sandia Mountains--sure, but not here. In Missouri, grass just grew. Xeriscaping in Missouri? No need for that and I'm sure they have no idea what the heck it is there. 

Either way, Albuquerque is supposed to get around 10-13 inches of rain a year and I doubt if we've even had a half inch of rain this year. The forecast is saying there's a small percentage of rain for this week. I hope it does. I need to drive in the rain. I need to smell the air after it rains. We need rain. I need rain. 

Those are all my rants for now. I've been thinking about many other things. I imagine I'll be writing more soon.

(I listened to Social Distortion while writing this blog post.)

MySpace

Remember MySpace? I don't either. I was just browsing my old blogs on that site and I ran into this oldie. I published it on 1/30/2009. I got a good chuckle out of it.

burrito

In economics we're taught about the marginal propensity to consume.  There's some dumb math equation and some theory to go along with the idea.. Who cares.  I'm thinking about my marginal propensity to make every food I encounter into a burrito.  It works with most food.  Chicken alfredo pasta, chicken ceasar salad, eggs and bacon, quishe, morning star farms chikin nuggets and buffalo style chikin nuggets.  Everything is better wrapped in a tortilla.  Well, maybe not.  Pizza is good not wrapped in a tortilla.  Cereal is good in a bowl with milk.  Some types of soups are good with no tortillias. Maybe it's the Latino in me, but I think tortillas are one of the greatest food inventions of all time. 

The other day a man on the bus welcomed me to his country.  He said, "Sir.  You're not from here are you? I would just like to welcome you to my country."  I said, "Thank you for that. But I'm actually from here.  I'm from Santa Fe."  He thought I was of some Middle Eastern descent.  Then he said I should shave my beard and so he doesn't mistake me for some other nationality.  Quite funny.

Why the heck do people think New Mexico is all desert and it is always warm here and we all speak Spanish.  I wish I spoke Spanish don't get me wrong, but we are part of the United States.  Sure the Spanish came here in like 500 BC, or whenever it was, so we do have lots of history with Spanish speakers, but after the Spanish left we became part of the United States--English speakers.  We have cars, we have airports, we have mountains, we have forests. We also have deserts.  Yes, and we have burritos, and everyone here likes them.

Strange Day

What an interesting day it has been so far. Our neighbor is really elderly. She's probably in her 80's or 90's. Today she kinda lashed out at me. It was really unexpected. Lindsey and Luke went to the zoo to enjoy the day while I stayed home and just sat around. I decided to grill myself a burger (cause that's what dudes do). While I was grilling she peered though my fence and started to tell me that she wished I would disappear. Her eyes looked like they were cloudy and her nose had dried blood around it. She continued on and told me that I was evil and said that she believes in God and that I am going to disappear. It really threw me off because other encounters I have had with her have not been so bad.

I didn't think to much about her words to me. I continued on and turned on Jon Stewart. While I was watching my program and eating my burger, I heard a pounding on my door. Diego (my dog) started to freak out and began to bark. It was her. She was pounding on my door. I have no idea what is going on in her brain. She does seem to have a bad case of dementia or some other mental illness. I called the police. They came over and asked me some questions. I was worried for her safety and for mine. Who knows if she has weapons in her home or not.

I hope this is that last bad encounter we have with our neighbor and I really do hope my call to the police leads to help that she needs.

Cold Day

It's a cold day today. It's like 40ºF outside right now. It's mid April. What the heck? Overall it's just been a strange day. I drank a Moose Drool beer last night and I woke up this morning with kind-of a hang over. My head felt stuffy. My body felt weak. And I was just overall tired. It could have been the beer. It could have been that I need some rest.

<This week has been weighing on me. Senseless tragedies like the Boston bombing. The reminder that our government is pretty much broken. Tons of snow in Denver in April. Super windy and cold here. Floods and supper cell storms in mid-Missouri. Giant fertilizer plan explosions in Texas. Earthquakes in the Middle East...

What's going on? We're reminded of how screwed we are as humans every day. Am I crazy for looking for hope in Jesus Christ? One of my favorite musicians of all time thinks so. Mike Herrera from MxPx talked about his loss of religion in an interview I read last night. Here is the link to the interview I read.  He talked about how he was brought up in a church and attended youth group and that's the only reason he believed in the Christian religion. I've been there. Why do I believe? I was brought up in a country that encourages Christianity. It I were born in Turkey I would probably be Muslim. Or if I were born in India I would be Hindu. Or if I were born in China I'd probably be Buddhist  If I were born on Utah I'd probably be Mormon. You get the point.  So what makes my God special?  What makes my choice the right one? Believe me, I wrestle with that idea all the time. Then I stop. I look up.  I think about our vast universe.  I think about the complexity of the human body. I think about all of what I don't know. This doesn't prove Jesus Christ is God. The universe doesn't prove God. My love for my son and wife doesn't prove God. Music doesn't prove God. Evil in this world doesn't prove God. Historical writings don't prove God. Can God be proven?  No. Because God can't be proven does not mean that he doesn't exist though.

I remember listening to Stephen Hawking and listening to him explain the origins of the universe.  Incredible. All I could think about is how amazing the first moments of existence must have been. Even Hawking admitted that he wanted to look at a supreme creator for the acting force behind our universe's beginning.  He doesn't believe a creator to be behind it, but his mind pointed to a creator for a moment.

Every day I have questions.  Every day I'm thankful that I have hope in Christ. I'm thankful that I was created with a mind that questions things. And I think God wants us to question his existence.  Blind faith is useless. We're brought up as Christians, but when you're old enough, think for yourself! Don't believe in something just because your parents believe it.

Today I read in Jeremiah about the Israelites and how they "whored" themselves about with other religions. They completely turned their backs on God. God expressed his feelings in the book. He expressed his anger. He expressed his love and his willingness to forgive.  Then I read in Luke about Jesus and how he taught us to love our enemies.  He showed this love by healing the ear of the chief priest's servant. A person who was arresting him to have him tried and eventually killed. Jesus showed love to that man.

Well, that's about all I want to talk about that. I still have a headache. It's still cold here. Evil still exists. Humans are still hateful. Just last night I was talking to a man on the phone for work. The man said I sounded like a nice man. Then he asked me if I was Caucasian  For whatever reason I answered his irrelevant  question as "yes". I'm not Caucasian  I'm Latino  I'm New Mexican.  I'm a darkey, Yo! After I answered he proceeded to tell me the most horrible, racist joke. I felt like my brain had been raped with hate.  I couldn't stop thinking about how terrible it was how this man said nasty things about a person only because of his race. This isn't new to humans, though. Racism is ugly and it is has been in existence since history has recorded.

So, pushing forward. It's Thursday. I hope it warms up. I hope this weekend brings joy. 

Sunday ... Continued

The day is almost over. Lindsey and I just put Luke down for the night. He was such a good little boy today. He ate really well. He loves to play with his truck and with his new trike. Lindsey has been sick all day. She slept most of the day. She's feeling better now. We all had dinner together and then we played more with Luke while listening to the Mars Hill sermon.

It was the first sermon in this newest series. It's titled Who Do You Think You Are?. The first sermon he basically identified that we all identify ourselves with something that is not the Creator but something that was created. He then followed by identifying "idols" in our lives. Idols are things that we "worship". These things could be our kids, our house, our Samsung Galaxy S3, our iPhone, our job...whatever.

It seems like a good series. That is one of the biggest problems we have as humans, finding our identity. What am I? Who am I? Identity is something that we have to have defined... I feel like my identity has been kinda washed out in the past couple of years. My world has been shaken. I'm no longer Lorenzo the MxPx fan and student. I'm now Lorenzo, husband, father, employee.

Anyway, I'll consider those things more. In the mean time, I have a week's worth of homework to do in three hours. It's okay though, I have this new (to me) album I downloaded from Local Natives called Gorilla Manor. 

Here are some photos of my day today. Enjoy!

Sunday

I just got a notice when I logged into Blogger that I can point out Google + friends in my blog posts. I'm going to try this out.

+Lindsey Dominguez I love you! :)

Truth is, Lindsey isn't feeling very well this morning. She has some sort of illness that is making her feel crumby. I hope it's not the flu and I hope it passes over soon.

Luke is sleeping right now and I really should be getting some homework done. Everything I have for this week is due today by 10 pm.

I guess I'll start that. I was going to start some music and I made a genius play list in iTunes based on John Mayer. I think I'm done with John Mayer. In stead, I purchased the Local Natives album from iTunes. I've never heard any of their music, but we'll see if I like them.

All for now, gotta get to this writing assignment.