Laying in the bed by myself sucks. Married for almost five years and this is only the second time I've gone to sleep without my Love. It's difficult...I'm not gonna lie. I did my fair share of laying by myself before I was married. I'll admit though that at this point in time it may be healthy. Lindsey is at a women's retreat with her good friend, Jenna. Marriage is something that I don't pretend to understand. I think that a lot of people don't understand marriage, thus the astronomical divorce rate. Marriage is about love. I think sacrifice comes in a close second however. Yes, I love my wife...with all my heart. Sacrifice is what we're still getting used to. At least I am. My life has completely changed in the past five years.
Who was I five years ago? Well, I was still Lorenzo. College going, beer drinking, karaoke singing. Seeking... I was seeking God. I was seeking love. We're all seeking love. I think humans need love to survive more than we need oxygen and water. Not just anyone can provide that love. I need to be loved and I need to love. I love Luke. He's my boy. And I didn't pick who he is. He came like he is. And I love him. My love for Luke and the love that Lindsey and I have, I think, are a metaphor for the love of God.
"Luke, don't put that in your mouth, that'll hurt you." There are plenty of things that Luke wants to do that I won't let him do because I know what's best for him. Yet Luke gets angry. He'll throw a fit. I don't care, I'm his dad and I know best.
So here I am. Laying by myself. Luke's in a crib next to me. Life is about this. Life is about love. Life's about trying to keep the love in our lives. Just like our lungs strain for oxygen, our hearts long for that love. Love of God. Love of our spouse. Love of our children.