There. I Said It.

“For we never came with words of flattery, as you know, nor with a pretext for greed—God is witness.

But we were gentle among you, like a nursing mother taking care of her own children.”
‭‭1 Thessalonians‬ ‭2:5, 7‬ ‭ESV‬‬,7.esv

As I read this, I think of a couple of things. I think of Christians who actually did suffer to be Christians, and who are still suffering today. I wonder how strong my faith would be under pressure. I think my faith is under some sort of pressure. Nothing like the early church, or what it's like in non Christian countries. I'm not persecuted. I might be thought if as a bigot, or ignorant among some of my peers. But I also have people among my demographic that are outspoken. Academics like the Liturgists. Former screamo guys on BC Pod. 

So, I'm not persecuted. 

It's also easy for me to criticize the church while reading this. I think of mega churches. Is it up to me to criticize? I've got my own problems. I can choose n…

Sunday Thoughts

“For they themselves report concerning us the kind of reception we had among you, and how you turned to God from idols to serve the living and true God, and to wait for his Son from heaven, whom he raised from the dead, Jesus who delivers us from the wrath to come.”
1 Thessalonians 1:9-10 ESV

The early church. I have a lot to learn, my attention is brought to it right now. I'm thinking about this verse here--or couple of verses, rather. They turned from idols to serve the living, true God. What did that look like? What was an idol for them back then?

I'll identify a few idols I have and what I think are idols in our culture today. First, I'd like to define "idol".

Google says:
noun: idol; plural noun: idols
an image or representation of a god used as an object of worship.
synonyms: icon, representation of a god, image, effigy, statue, figure, figurine, fetish, totem; More
graven image, false god, golden calf


Okay. Here I am. I feel like pressure is hitting me from all directions. I should be doing work, but I feel like I need this for mental health. Some things on my mind include: commuting on my bike, domain 1, CNM, selling our This is all on my mind and it's all overwhelming me. It's hard for me to sort out everything that needs to be done and make a plan to accomplish those things.

I would say I do have a priority list that's already made up in my mind. I'd say that CNM is number one. I'm going to CNM to get my teaching license. Right now, I'm teaching under an internship license, and I'll have to apply for my full license when I'm finished with the CNM program. There's one problem. My lesson planning class. I've turned in three lesson plans and it turns out they don't align completely. I took the professor's comments and applied them to my work, and I'm still missing something. I'm stressing out. I'll be meetin…

Hey, Neighbor!

Our church is focusing our attention on how to be a good neighbor. We're using Matthew 22 as a point of reference. Jesus said to "love your God" and to "love your neighbor". So, we talked about this last night at some friend's house. We're looking at our "neighbor" as it literally is--the person or family that lives next door to us. We talked about how we can love those people.

It was really hard for me to think about ways I could love my neighbor. Even now... I'm blind to it. I don't know how. We talked about how it's simpler than we think. We also remembered good neighbors in our past. I remembered Tony.

Tony was a man that lived next to us in Santa Fe when I was growing up. Tony was old. I think he was in his 90s. He was born at the end of the 19th century, which I thought was really cool. He sat on a bench, that I think he made, outside of his front door. He sat there in the evening. Summer evenings in Santa Fe are pretty aweso…

Envy, Money, Minimalism

I set a goal, and I'm finishing it here. I had a few goals I wrote down here.

My blog post. What do I write? I don't have much on my mind. I just paid bills. That was great.

Bills. Budgets. Things. Lindsey and I had a conversation last night. I was pretty bummed out about those things. I had this feeling. A feeling of entitlement. I felt like I was entitled to a better car than I have. Maybe a Honda Civic si, or a Toyota 4Runner. I felt like I was entitled to a better house, one in a better neighborhood. I felt like I was entitled to more things. I just felt entitled.

Then I felt envious, a bit. I thought about other people and imagined what their salaries are. I imagined salaries much, much higher than mine is. I compared myself to them. I wondered if they're better than I am, more motivated, smarter, more handsome, better interviewers...just better at life. Or, I asked myself if I was just worse. Below average. They're normal, I'm the one that's bad at life.

Coffee Made Me Do It

I'm really pushing myself to post this right now. I set a goal four days ago, that I would write in this blog every day this week. I've done so. But, it's hard.

So, I wouldn't be true to the theme of this blog if I didn't post something completely worthless. I have this weird OCD where I can't unplug my devices from charging unless they're fully charged. It's supper weird, but I can't. I shouldn't say, "can't". I just unplugged this MacBook Pro and it was 96%.

I like tech. Too much. I'm weird.

A couple other things. I was thinking about the blog post I posted yesterday. I said the f-word. You know... because it was on my mind. Language is weird to me. I shared my blog on Facebook. My mother in law in on there, my father in law, too. People in my community group, people that go to my church. What will they think about me? I'm talking about doubt and I said a cuss word.

I should worry about what people think about me, right? …


Day three of writing in my blog. Worthless information, I know. Well, perhaps when I'm long gone, bones left, my kids and their kids will find this bit of information valuable.

In fact, that's usually who I look at as my audience when I write here. Curiously, most of my hits on this blog have been from Russia. Don't know what's up with that. Anyway, I'm still talking to my kids and their kids.

It's a good day to write. Yesterday, I had the pleasure of hanging out with my nephew (7) in addition to hanging out with my two sons and daughter (0.5-4). It was a bit hectic to say the least. My thoughts weren't gathered, a bit scattered. Today, I think my thoughts are more settled. Gathered. Plus, I'm drinking a beer, and I'm enjoying it. My mood is...chirpy(?). Optimistic, maybe. I don't know.

Speaking of beer. My diet crashed and burned yesterday. Hard. There were no survivors. Here's a screen shot of my calorie counter app:

My goal was to adhere …