I'm kinda casually reading this book. The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer. It was a free book on iBooks for my iPad. I would like to read more. I think I've said this before, but I think I have an undiagnosed condition that hinders my reading. Maybe it's with attention, maybe it's with comprehension. I'm not sure. Maybe it's not a condition, maybe I just have a harder time than most.
Anyway, I'm trying to make an effort to read more. For a couple of reasons: I want to know more. I want knowledge. And when I'm reading a book, I'm not playing Clash Royale, or looking at Facebook, or reading about the terrible news that's being reported. I think all of those things have their place. Facebook is good, in moderation. I want to hear about what's happening in other peoples life and fake news is amusing at times. Clash Royale is probably not good for my brain. I don't know. There's some strategy there... I could try and try to justify it, but it could go away. The news. Oh, the news. I understand why some people want to stick their head in the sand. I do think it's good to be aware of your surroundings, it's just hard to discern what's news and what's not. What's opinion and what's an unbiased report?
I could go on and on about news. I know there's a lot of talk about mainstream media and fake news on social media. What a time we live in. I think our culture is trying to catch up to our technology. It's interesting to watch, but a bit scary at the same time.
So, books. This book I'm casually reading is interesting so far. It's an easy read--a short book. I think I've read the first two chapters. Good stuff. I know it's good stuff, but I don't remember much of it. See what I'm saying? It's difficult for me to remember what I've read. I don't retain these things. I know if I were to "leaf" through my digital copy of the book, I'd be reminded of what I read. I know the second chapter was about things. Humans need things. At least we think we need things.
It was a good read for me and timely. I was thinking about contentment this past week. It's difficult for me to be content. In the book, Tozer talks about what Jesus said by leaving everything, taking up your cross and following.
We live in such a wasteful culture. We have more than enough. Bounty. Yet, I see people who I perceive as being better off, and I envy. It just happens. Then I wonder why I'm not good enough. I wonder why I can't be as "well off" as them. I look at my situation as poverty.
Tozer talked about the situation in the Old Testament with Abraham and Isaac. Abraham looked at Isaac as his prized possession. He loved him, but it consumed him. Isaac was his idol and there wasn't room for God in Abraham's heart. I've always looked at this story as harsh. But, I guess I see the point. God brought Abraham down. In Abraham's mind, Isaac was gone. Abraham was deprived his everything. So, when it ended up that he didn't have to kill Isaac, he knew. He knew that nothing else mattered. It's still a little hard for me to wrap my head around...
I also read Philippians yesterday. So good.
Philippians 4 ESV
11 Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. 12 I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. 13 I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Content. Find ways for your heart to open up to the sacred. Live simply. I know there's something there, I'm still trying to figure it out. The Universe gives me bits of truth. And I wonder at it. Right now, I'm teaching kids about cells and what they do. We started the unit by looking at scale. (http://htwins.net/scale2/). It's incredible. Technology has allowed us to look at the insanely tiny all the way to the insanely huge. This is where we live. Are there things that are smaller than the smallest, or larger than the largest? How did this all come about? And cells. Every tiny little cell has a job to do. Every tiny little cell has detail. It's mind blowing.
And I have a purpose.
Phil. 3:7 But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ.
This dude was golden. Paul. He's a Jew of Jews. Accepted. He's studied--academic. But all of that was counted as loss in comparison to knowing this man, Christ.
Things don't matter. My Apple devices don't matter. My bike, my car, my house doesn't matter. There's a deeper purpose. A connection with the cosmic. A connection with the Universe. Knowledge, understanding, awareness. There's love. I have no clue. I'm trying to figure this out.