Losing energy today... This coffee has been too hot for me to drink. I think I'll start sipping now. ...Perfect temperature. This is one of those really thoughtful weeks. Sometimes I just think about life a lot. I'm not worried. Life is crazy though. There's so much happening. Are we going to be okay? Why isn't life just perfect? It's just not. There are bad things that happen all the time. At the same time, there are good things that happen too. Like my little boy's smile. That's a real good thing.
I just get discouraged every time I log into facebook and read what's going on in people's minds. You know, we all have opinions, it's good to have opinions, it just seems like we just really don't get along with each other. This is evident while this election is heating up. We are a divided country. Then I visit my news app on my phone and all I read about is terrible things. It seems like the entire Earth is restless. I'm just waiting for the next tragedy to come along. I hope that there is no more war. That's what humans do best though. We disagree and then we fight. Then people die. This has been going on for thousands of years. If I think about how much pain is on Earth too long it starts to bring me down.
But I can't focus on the negative. What's the positive? I got to hang out with my family last night. That was good. I don't get to see them very often.
We were given a couch for our living room. It has two recliners. It's super comfortable. Last night, Lindsey and I ordered her new glasses while sitting on this comfortable couch. We also watched Star Trek: The Next Generation while sitting on this lovely couch.
So that was a positive thing in life.
I have a loving family. I love my wife more than anything. I love my son more than anything. We are a young family and we are still learning how this all works. But it's nice to know that I'm loved by Lindsey. It really sucks that our work schedules are all wacked out, but I know we'll get to where we need to be. Patience has been a big lesson for or family.
Music is a positive. It's a temporary escape from the garbage we have to hear about and deal with everyday. I'm listening to The Modern Post right now on Mars Hill's website. It's good music. It makes me glad to listen.
This morning, Luke and I read the Bible together. Right now we're reading Judges in the Old Testament and Mark in the New Testament. There's a lot of weird things that go on in the Old Testament. Just a few days ago we read about a guy named Jephthah (who was the son of a whore) who made a vow to God that if he defeated his opponent in war that he would sacrifice whatever he saw walked out of his home first. I don't know what the heck he was thinking it might be. I'm sure he was aware that his family goes in and out of his home. I don't know if he expected a bunch of young goats to be going in and out of his home. Of course, when he got home, the first thing he sees coming out of his home is his daughter. So of course he's all torn up. He has to sacrifice his daughter to God. It's weird that God didn't stop him. But God didn't really say anything at all. I was expecting God to stop him from the sacrifice just like God stooped Abraham from sacrificing his son. But, there was really no interaction between Jephthah and God at all about the sacrifice. God didn't say that he needed to, I think that Jephthah just did it. Another messed up part of the story is that Jephthah's daughter wasn't married (she had never had sex), so she asked her father if it would be cool if she partied it up for a while before her father had to kill her, so she did. When she came home, her dad had sex with her, then he sacrificed her. Messed up! Why the heck is this in the Bible?
But this is my faith. I have a hard time understanding some of the things I read. And I want to understand. I like to see myself as a logical person. I know that many people would just say that I thew all logic out the window when I started reading the Bible and believing it. But that's okay. They can think whatever they want about me. I'm not super weird. I believe God created the universe. I believe man sinned. I believe God loves me and every human. I believe God is perfect and cannot be with sin. His solution was to come to Earth and die for his children. God sees humans as his children. I'm starting to understand God's love towards humans as a father-to-child love, now that I have a son. I understand that kind of love more.
Have I lost you? Do you think I've lost my marbles? That's okay.
I believe God came to earth and the only way to delete our darkness, our pain, our suffering, our imperfectness, was to sacrifice himself. How weird does that sound? Super weird. But that's what I believe. God loves. God knows me. God desires my company. He wants me to come to him when I'm having a hard time in life. He knows that there is pain. And just like I embrace my son when he's crying, God embraces me and tells me that I'll be okay. So I trust in God.
Now I've weirded out all of my old friends that probably didn't know this about me.
This is my life. This is what I believe. I'll continue to study. I'll continue to read. I'll continue to think. My mind's not closed.
This is a good hymn to leave you with. I'm listening to it right now. And you can judge me if you want. But still be my friend. I'll still have a beer with you. I'll still hang out. So invite me over, or come over and hang out with me.
If you want to listen to the song I'm listening to then navigate here: http://marshill.com/music/albums/asaphs-arrows and click on In Christ Alone. Here are the lyrics to this song (and chords).
Arrangement by Kingʼs Kaleidoscope
Em Bm7! ! Cmaj7
In Christ alone my hope is found, He is my light, my strength, my song
This cornerstone, this solid ground, Firm through the ﬁercest drought and storm.
C! ! ! D
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
G D Cmaj7
My comforter, my all in all—Here in the love of Christ I stand.
In Christ alone, Who took on ﬂesh, fullness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness, scorned by the ones He came to save.
Till on that cross as Jesus died, the wrath of God was satisﬁed
For every sin on Him was laid—Here in the death of Christ I live.
Em Bm7!! Cmaj7
There in the ground His body lay, light of the world by darkness slain
" " G D! ! C
Then bursting forth in glorious day, up from the grave He rose again!
C D C D
And as He stands in victory, sin's curse has lost its grip on me;
G! ! ! D C
For I am His and He is mine—bought with the precious blood of Christ.
G D C
No guilt in life, no fear in death—this is the power of Christ in me
From life's ﬁrst cry to ﬁnal breath, Jesus commands my destiny.
No pow'r of hell, no scheme of man, can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home—here in the power of Christ I'll stand
In Christ Alone