23 December 2016

Envy, Money, Minimalism

I set a goal, and I'm finishing it here. I had a few goals I wrote down here.

My blog post. What do I write? I don't have much on my mind. I just paid bills. That was great.

Bills. Budgets. Things. Lindsey and I had a conversation last night. I was pretty bummed out about those things. I had this feeling. A feeling of entitlement. I felt like I was entitled to a better car than I have. Maybe a Honda Civic si, or a Toyota 4Runner. I felt like I was entitled to a better house, one in a better neighborhood. I felt like I was entitled to more things. I just felt entitled.

Then I felt envious, a bit. I thought about other people and imagined what their salaries are. I imagined salaries much, much higher than mine is. I compared myself to them. I wondered if they're better than I am, more motivated, smarter, more handsome, better interviewers...just better at life. Or, I asked myself if I was just worse. Below average. They're normal, I'm the one that's bad at life.

There were thoughts I didn't like. And, I told Lindsey, "I'm sick and tired of this". She was strong. She talked to me about how enough is what we have. We have enough. Crazy. I just thought about what our pastor was talking about on Sunday. Maybe it was this last Sunday, maybe it was the Sunday before. He mentioned something about poverty, and that the opposite of poverty isn't wealth. The opposite of poverty is enough. People in poverty and deprived in some ways, and people who are prosperous are deprived in others. The opposite is enough...

I went off on a tangent. I was talking about my conversation with Lindsey. We talked about how we had enough. I see it. Our bills are paid. There's not much left, but our bills are paid.

I had more to say, but I got distracted. I think I was going to talk about minimalism. Yeah, I was going to mention minimalism. So, there's this podcast I listen to occasionally called Don't Feed the Trolls. There's an episode where they interviewed Jon Shneck (formally Relient K). He was talking about minimalism. When they were discussing this...movement, it sounded very appealing to me. I'm talking about this because I think it has a lot to do with my envy and my worry about money. There's so much crap I don't need or don't use. I want to investigate minimalism more.

That's all I've got for now. Perhaps I'll take some pictures this next week and post them here. Probably not though.

No comments: